Teddy's gone, but here's how to sum up his legacy

Last week, while I was in Mississippi attending the funeral of my wife's grandmother--a truly great and good person, a caring heart who never did anything to hurt another soul--Ted Kennedy dropped dead. Immediately, the stories of how wonderful the "Liberal Lion" of the Senate was began to pollute the airwaves.

Of course, no person is totally bad--hang on, Stalin, Hitler, Saddam and Mao, I just changed my mind on you--but Kennedy has a lot to answer for when it comes to the actions of this life. Just a few that come to mind:

• A was a serial philanderer who helped put his first wife at the bottom of a bottle;
• He would defame, slander and ruin the reputation of another human being for political expense (Robert Bork, anyone?);
• He was known for boorish conduct, if not outright sexual harassment of women, during his "wilderness years";
• He expected other people to live and operate under a different set of standards than he set for himself.
• Oh, yeah: he was directly responsible for the death of another human being.
  

Why did he do all this? Because he thought, correctly as it turns out, that he could. He was not only a child of privilege, but an example of sheer, unbridled arrogance. That arrogance didn't diminish with age, as he screamed and yelled about the need for alternative energy sources, then fought tooth and nail against a proposed wind farm on Cape Cod. But nothing shows his chutzpah better than a letter he sent to Pope Benedict XVI asking for him to pray on his behalf before he died.

That letter didn't read anything like this, but in an honest world, it would have:

"Dear Pope:

For the last 47 years, I have consistently opposed the doctrine of the Catholic Church during my service in the United States Senate, both on the floor of that institution and in my personal life. I have vigorously fought against many of the church's dictates, including its opposition to contraception and abortion and its stance on homosexuality. During my first marriage, which was later annulled (thanks for that, by the way), I repeatedly took part in adulterous relationships. I was also in the driver of a car that ended up in the Chappaquiddick River in July 1969 that cost Mary Jo Kopechne her life. Though I was in a position to assist Ms. Kopechne in escaping the car, I did not do so.

For five decades, I have publicly and personally scorned the Church's dictates. But let's let bygones be bygones, shall we?

Let's cut to the chase: I'm 77 and I'm dying of an incurable brain tumor. I really want to make sure I make it to heaven, so would you please put aside my past transgressions and pray on my behalf? I know the Almighty will listen to you, and that you'll do as I ask.

After all, I am a Kennedy.

Sincerely yours,

Edward M. Kennedy"

The silence from the Vatican seems to indicate the Pope told Teddy to go pound sand. Ouch.

Rest in Peace, Teddy.